Today I have been doing fast-walking for half an hour. My legs are still killing me. Also Ive played a lot of the Sims 4. Ive forgotten how fun game it actually is. I think is should stream it more. I did stream it a bit but because I havent been streaming for while I found it bit exhausting. As those who know me know, at the other hand Im really social person and I love talking with people. But then I'm also kind of person who gets exhausted when being around of lots of people or pressure. And streaming also is stressing in a way. Especially when I keep the face cam on. I m always worrying if I talk clear enouhg or look okay for the shot.
I m really self aware and I tend to critisize myself way too much and that is most common reason for me being tired in the end. I m just over extending stuff inside my small rabbit brains and making such a fuss about everything when in the end there is nothing to worry about. One example of this kind of behaviour is I got really nervous when I noticed someone was checking this blog once in half an hour from same IP address. As blog writer I should be happy for it but for some reason my first question was like "Did I do something wrong because someone is reading my blog?" And I stressed and chatted about it for couple dear friends of mine and they convinced me that it was okay and normal. But like I admit that I must have some kind of trauma of situations where I'm noticed I usually flarg something up and fail so much that at least someone is displeased on me. And there we go again on the subject that I've talked a lot about lately. I still have this odd urge to please people and over think about what other people think about me into the lengts that I m not able to enjoy at all.
Now I realize how silly it was me to panic about getting readers when in fact I love that you guys read this blog. I enjoy talking and telling you what I think about. But for some reason I just got bit creeped out.
But that does not mean that I dont want you to read my blog. I just was not so used into fact that someone would actually read this. To me this has been mostly a thing I do for my own enjoyment and I havent been really paying any attenttion whatever someone reads this or not even I did put Adsense up here like years ago. And yes, I m sorry that you have to suffer trough Ads, but at the moment I dont have a job and I could really use the extra money Google is offering for each Add that I manage to show so please bare with it.
Oh boy. I was planning this to be short update from today but somehow this just got out of paws again. Well, this is me, when I start to talking or writing about something there is no end for the fload of words or the text. The stuff just comes automaticly out from my brains with out me noticing anything, exept the huge amount of text that I've left behind. Its crazy really how I just think like okay lets put here couple of words about what I've been doing today and before I even notice it there are lots of text, but then again people say its a good thing.
But anyhows its past 21:00 pm local time and I think I'm going to quit hanging online and playing the Sims 4 for today and I will try to go and get some sleep.
But again, I love when you people have the energy to read my blog. Big thank you for that. Hugs and God bless and good night.
-Varjokani
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