This text is 100% improvised and 100% fiction. None were harmed while writing this. And I'm not recommeding any of u to read any part of this. Its part of my old story re-done and improvised.
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The sky is darkening around me. I feel lonely.. and so cold. I feel like losting last rips of my senses as darkness falls over me. I try keep breathing and staying awake. But its impossible. I can't feel the pain anymore. I have felt too much of it. So I cant feel any no more. I smile. Finally.. Finally its time for the grand ending. -- But how much did it cost. How many times I was scared for this. Many for sure. But now it finally was the end. I felt so calm and almost happy for it. finally. No more pain or conspiracies around me. Finally.
The darkness closes in and I fell a deep sleep.
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I open my eyes. I'm silently coming to my senses again. I feel like would suddenly fallen into sleep after long day at doing something hard. I'm running. The sun keeps hovering over me. I'm thirsty. What happened? Why m'I running? What just happened? Where m I? I turn my head as I run to see whats behind me. Bad mistake. I fall. I feel something sharp beating over my face. Branches and trees hit me in a second I stop looking where I'm runnin. I struggle trought them with cursing and spitting needles from pinetrees as I run. Or struggle. At this rate running is impossible. I get clear of the worst bush and start running again. I turn around again to see if there is something behind me. I don't remember anything for couple last seconds. I m confused, and scared.
I get struct and hit again. But this time its different. Its something soft ... and furry. I fall down with it. I feel something metallic and cold being held against my neck. My heart starts racing even more. 'Shit.. I'm done for'.
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Want me to continiue? Maybe I will if you share this and comment this. :)
Showing posts with label furry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label furry. Show all posts
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Friday, September 12, 2014
I never had skill to shut up
This is really interesting. When I m planning going to sleep but then suddenly I feel like my head is full of pictures and sounds and all I want to do is write about them or draw or sing or do anything else than sleeping. Is this part of the adhd? Maybe. Or maybe we never shall see the truth that is hidden behind the mist that is all around my head.
Nowdays only way to open my heart or make any kind of diagnose inside my head for myself is to write things down. In situations like this I usually have nothing to tell or write about but when I do write I notice all the things I end up telling from deep inside my head. Its kinda scary, and it is happening again right now. I really have nothing to say about but still I keep writing words that come from somewhere deep middle of the dusky darkness that people call their imagination or their head.
Maybe I should go to sleep.. or at least do my readers a favor and write this in Finnish. But somehow I feel like this thing gets rotten if tried to force myself speak Finnish. Funny fact, I do lots of thinking in English while I m thinking etc what to write about.Or at least now when all words just flow from somewhere and make my hands move in keyboard it is English. I really don't know why this feels so natural. An other weirdo natural feeling thing is Russia. I started to learn reading it a week ago but still it feels like some magical force has turned right direction when I read English or Russian. It just feels like a dream within a dream. Like a distant memory of a dream I have seen long ago far from here.
But where did these memories came from? Why does it seem so right? Who m'I anyways?Many times I have felt my head and world inside my head ain't like any other. I feel like I m freak, and for damn sure you now think I m a freak. I don't care. The most crazies things number one is that I don't care about anything. Its mostly likely part of me being at home and thinking of job opportunities and changes I can take? Maybe I should to rush into action instead of sitting here but I just kinda aren't the type of person.. I dunno
And just to rewind bit back like I told you earlier I had no intention to write long text. My idea was mostly to go to sleep but as soon as I started writing my head seems to be filled with words that come directly from somewhere to my brains and I only do like a robot, write without half of me realizing I have again filled almost whole page with this odd thinking I m doing.
Now when I remember it when I was a kid I used to talk to myself. Do it a lot. Then At age of 4 or 5 I learned other people did not do it. They kept thinking inside their heads. Then I studied it but now I keep thinking maybe this is somekind of variation of this thing.
And to the other thing, sometimes I feel like there are many personalities inside of myself. There is me, and the other me. Its really scary and spooky and I could write about it a whole book. Maybe I should not confuse your head no longer with it.
I already have spoken about it earlier. I think now it is time to me to go to bed and keep talking tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow sounds good doesn't it? Its surely is full of hope end being brighter.
Nowdays only way to open my heart or make any kind of diagnose inside my head for myself is to write things down. In situations like this I usually have nothing to tell or write about but when I do write I notice all the things I end up telling from deep inside my head. Its kinda scary, and it is happening again right now. I really have nothing to say about but still I keep writing words that come from somewhere deep middle of the dusky darkness that people call their imagination or their head.
Maybe I should go to sleep.. or at least do my readers a favor and write this in Finnish. But somehow I feel like this thing gets rotten if tried to force myself speak Finnish. Funny fact, I do lots of thinking in English while I m thinking etc what to write about.Or at least now when all words just flow from somewhere and make my hands move in keyboard it is English. I really don't know why this feels so natural. An other weirdo natural feeling thing is Russia. I started to learn reading it a week ago but still it feels like some magical force has turned right direction when I read English or Russian. It just feels like a dream within a dream. Like a distant memory of a dream I have seen long ago far from here.
But where did these memories came from? Why does it seem so right? Who m'I anyways?Many times I have felt my head and world inside my head ain't like any other. I feel like I m freak, and for damn sure you now think I m a freak. I don't care. The most crazies things number one is that I don't care about anything. Its mostly likely part of me being at home and thinking of job opportunities and changes I can take? Maybe I should to rush into action instead of sitting here but I just kinda aren't the type of person.. I dunno
And just to rewind bit back like I told you earlier I had no intention to write long text. My idea was mostly to go to sleep but as soon as I started writing my head seems to be filled with words that come directly from somewhere to my brains and I only do like a robot, write without half of me realizing I have again filled almost whole page with this odd thinking I m doing.
Now when I remember it when I was a kid I used to talk to myself. Do it a lot. Then At age of 4 or 5 I learned other people did not do it. They kept thinking inside their heads. Then I studied it but now I keep thinking maybe this is somekind of variation of this thing.
And to the other thing, sometimes I feel like there are many personalities inside of myself. There is me, and the other me. Its really scary and spooky and I could write about it a whole book. Maybe I should not confuse your head no longer with it.
I already have spoken about it earlier. I think now it is time to me to go to bed and keep talking tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow sounds good doesn't it? Its surely is full of hope end being brighter.
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